Love and War

Dog: Pet me, pet me, pet me, pet me, pet me, pet me, pet me, pet me, pet me, pet me, pet me, pet me, pet me, pet me, pet me, pet me, pet me, pet me, pet me, pet me, pet me, pet me, pet me, pet me, pet me, pet me, pet me....

Human:  I can't continuously pet you!

Dog: *Sigh* ....Pet me, pet me, pet me, pet me, pet me, pet me, pet me, pet me, pet me, pet me, pet me, pet me, pet me, pet me, pet me, pet me, pet me, pet me, pet me, pet me....

Dinner

Human:  Out of groceries AGAIN!

Dog: Kibble AGAIN!  Hmmm, maybe if I puke she will buy the special canned food....

The Laundry

Dog: Each day when my human goes to work, I try my very best to help around the house.  One of the areas in which I find myself constantly occupied is with my human's clothing.  There is a large machine in which my human constantly puts her clothing.  I have determined that she is trying to improve the scent of her garments, and so to help her accomplish this I mark the clean clothes as they come out of the white machine.  I feel I am a great help when it comes to the laundry.

Human: Why does my dog piss on my clean clothes?